dear Lord, i dont know what to do, i dont what i feel.... hay..;. in wish to loive another life, a perfectrlife, a life that im suuceessful, but oh, Gopd please help me not to feel this way o God, by your grace o Lord help me control mysel,Lord, :( im so sad, hay.....

seminary?

i was looking at keren's blog when i found a link to SBC, singapore bible college, it weird felt like i have to go there, hay... i know my calling was never was that strong... sometimes i felt it but oftne time i chose not to think about it, or im so preoccupied with something else that i dont think about it... hay... now im thining about again, hmm... says there that the deadline for application is on sept pa, so i still have klike 8 months, what im planing to do is to review for the cls then take the exam on novermber but same time apply for sbc, im not sure if they will alow me, hmm... then Go home sa phil nex yr, around feb then stay there for a few months then leave again for singapore. but... how could i apply for it? hmm... that wil give me enough time to save money help raymon sa school,. but will it be enough? hay....God i dont know whats your plan is, i dont know if this is really for me, lord im afraid, lord i dont know what to do. hay, im not sure ill be mature enough, hay... God......help me please show me the way...

myjourney

hmm.... i made anew blog, well the reason is that quite few is viewing the blog im using now, i feel like i cant write what i want to write, and its bias, if you know people is reading it, you try to sentionalized everything, you tend to write for them what they want to hear instead of what you feel like writing, wdout bias, what you feel...

my spritual life is kind of hazzy, i keep on falling in temtation, sometimes i ask God that he gave me a wife, but is it what i need? a wife? hmm... i cant remmebr the verse and chapter, but there is a passage in the scripture that says, how can a young man b keep pure? by following Gods word... hmm.. i have to check on that... hay.. but im negnekting my bible, feel like im afraid to get convicted, but thats wht i need.. hay o Lord please forgive me for being a fikkle minded person, forgive me for not asking you for help, forgive me ffor trusting myself, Lord i ask for your forgiveness and cleanse me dear Lord. Lord father no matter how hard i try to be holy, i cant do it alone, and no matter good things i did i know its not enough to save me, for it by your grace that im saved.